Posts tagged "etiquette tips"
July 13, 2019
If you’re like me, you can’t wait for summer to arrive! Summer means enjoying all the best that the good weather has to offer, like going to my local beach to relax. I love the feel of the warm sand between my toes, cooling off with a swim, then topping off the day with a picnic or a good read on a beach chair. If you’re heading to your local beach anytime soon, here are some thoughts to keep in mind to make it enjoyable for yourself and others.
Keep it Clean
In an early episode of Mad Men, Don Draper’s family left a picnic by simply shaking their blanket and leaving the trash behind! Times have changed – and for the better. When disposing of your waste at the beach, make sure you use the proper recycling and garbage disposal bins. Not only does it keep the beach pristine for others, it keeps the bees and ants from gathering where they’re not wanted.
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Posted by Margaret Page in Uncategorized and tagged etiquette tips, good manners, Beach, Beach Etiquette, Summer
May 29, 2019
Today’s bride and groom are defining their special day in a way that reflects their style and interests in a much more personalized manner than ever before. Blinged-out sneakers instead of white pumps, receptions at micro breweries, and saying ‘I Do’ while wearing flip flops on a Hawaiian beach.
My best friends in the whole world are the four I graduated from high school with in 1980. We got our drivers licenses together, shared our boy crushes and snuck away to concerts together before we received our Dogwood diploma. We never gave much thought about who we would marry, let alone thinking about children’s weddings. That was for when we were old; certainly not now!
Well, fast forward 40 years and guess what? Yup – I am attending a destination wedding in France. Not my friend’s, but her daughter Meaghan’s and her fiancé, Arnaud. And not in a church, but a chateau that has been in the family for centuries. Back in 1980, most of my high school contemporaries were getting married at the local community centre, let alone somewhere outside of town. Meaghan was my flower girl, so I was super happy and excited to attend. Who wouldn’t want to attend a wedding in a French chateau?
As romantic as a French chateau wedding sounds, I can’t help but think the logistics could be a royal nightmare (pun intended). Who makes sure the chateau isn’t full of cobwebs? Is the local priest a 97-year old that doesn’t speak English? Is the local wine any good or should we be using it as red wine vinegar to pour over the fig salad? How does one know this when you live 8300 km away?
I caught up with Meaghan yesterday to get some answers. Apparently, the most challenging thing is that you don’t know what you don’t know. What does that mean exactly? Well, take catering for example. In North America, we’ve come to expect custom service levels that resemble à la carte. The French caterer was quite amused when asked if plates and cutlery were included. Her response? “Well, what else would you eat on?”
Local etiquette and business customs also came into play when thinking about a destination wedding. Apparently asking a wedding expert to make all kinds of changes was a major faux pas. She is the expert, right? Isn’t that why the bride and groom hired them? Deferring to her expertise was something Meaghan and Arnaud had to learn along the way. No problem! Well, except for the fish. Fish you ask? When the wedding couple requested three vegan dishes, they were told, “No problem, we’ll serve local fish.” When the bride went on to explain that local fish would not work either, the caterer said she would be able to work around it. Thank goodness she was able to serve the three vegans some lovely salmon filets instead. Oops!
Navigating foreign paperwork has its own challenges as well. If a non-French citizen wants to get married in France, paperwork needs completing to determine if they are eligible to marry there. Arnaud, having been born in France, happily translated all the documents into English. Turns out all Meaghan needed to provide was a “Certificate of Celibacy”. Wait…what? How on earth was the Federal Department of Global Affairs Canada going to be able to provide that kind of certificate, never mind validating the claim? Awkward!! In the end Arnaud’s translating needed some tweaking. Turns out all they required was proof she was single (célibataire) and had no plans on being a polygamist. Talk about lost in translation!
Lessons to take away? If planning a destination wedding, keep local customs in mind (tipping included), double check your language translations and always, always keep your sense of humour because cobwebs in the chateau are probably the least of your concerns. And really, have you ever tasted bad French wine?
Karen Taipalus lives and works in Delta, BC and enjoys writing short stories and articles based on every-day life events. She likes travelling with her family, wine tasting with girlfriends, bookclub and pickleball. Karen works in business development and social media.
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Posted by Margaret Page in Uncategorized and tagged etiquette tips, bride, travel, love, weddings, destination weddings, groom
May 20, 2019
Hopping on your bike for a cycle around your community or on the local bike trails seems like a no brainer on a nice spring day. In recognition of cycling week (usually in May worldwide and May 27 to June 2 in Canada), here are some bike tips to keep in mind that will make your cycling safe and enjoyable:
- Safety is your number one priority
- Ensure your bike is in good working condition before you head out for a cycle (tires are fully inflated, chain is greased, brakes and gears are functioning properly)
- Always wear a helmet, even though it might look dorky. See #1!
- Wear reflective gear if you’re venturing out at dusk
- Make yourself highly visible at all times. Avoid getting in a driver’s blind spot, especially at street corners and stoplights
- Add a light to the front and back of your bike. Visibility, again, is a big one, and a light is a must to be safe on the roads after daylight
- Hook up a bell to your bike. Being heard is just as important as been seen!
- Wear proper clothing. Choose clothing and shoes that are comfortable and suit your bicycle. You don’t want anything to get caught in the wheels (or reveal too much skin!) Padded riding shorts are best for long distances or when you will be cycling over several days.
- Protective eyewear is a great idea. Avid cyclists find ski goggles work the best. They protect much of your face and they’re fog proof!
- Red means stop. Obey the rules of the road-both at traffic lights and stop signs. (Did I mention…Safety first?)
- Know and use arm signals:
- Left arm straight out to signal a left turn
- Right arm straight out for a right turn (or left arm upright at a 90-degree angle)
- Palm or fist behind your lower back to signal slowing or stopping (when in a group)
- Stay to the right when in front of a group of cyclists to allow room for others to pass safely on your left
- Communicate when riding with a group. If you see a hazard up ahead, let your fellow cyclists know about it
- Maintain a steady, straight line and avoid braking or changing direction suddenly
- Never try to push your rights with vehicles (if in doubt…yield)
- Plan your route stick to approved cycle trails when you can
- Drink lots of water
- Bring your fully-charged cell phone for emergencies (and photos!)
- If you are cycling alone, make sure you tell someone where you are headed and when to expect you back
- Have Fun!
- More Bike month info
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Posted by Margaret Page in Everyday Etiquette, Just for Fun and tagged etiquette tips, manners, cycling
November 20, 2018
Business etiquette sometimes catches up with us outside the office: in coffee shops, at a friend’s house, or even grocery shopping. An associate recently told me that she was dreading running into a former co-worker who had been abruptly fired the week before. What should she say to this person? How could she avoid making a touchy event worse?
The short answer: Be kind. Be hopeful. Be discreet. You can’t always control how or when you’ll encounter tricky situations, but with a little foresight you can prepare and eliminate awkwardness. Here are four tips to keep you on track.
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Posted by Margaret Page in Uncategorized, Communication, Etiquette Tips, Everyday Etiquette and tagged etiquette tips, good manners
April 11, 2018
Women, tell me if you’re familiar with this scenario: You tell a colleague that her work on a presentation was stellar — clear, concise, funny, thoughtful. You walked away with amazing insights and tell her you appreciate her hard work.
And then she brushes it off.
“Oh, it wasn’t that good,” she says.
Or, “I had a lot of help.”
Or maybe even: “I could have done better if I had done more to prepare.”
Sound familiar? You might be cringing right now because you’ve been that woman throwing away a compliment as if it were a hot potato. Can you imagine a man doing such a thing? Why is it that we have such a difficult time just saying, “Thank you! I worked hard.” Or, even better, taking that compliment to heart and really savouring it?
The urge to throw away compliments is real. According to a study by Robert Herbert, a sociolinguist, compliments given from one man to another were accepted 40 percent of the time. Yet women accept only a dismal 22 percent of compliments from other women. (Interestingly, woman accept compliments 68 percent of the time when given by men.)
What makes us throw up our compliment armor? There are several reasons why.
- We don’t want to stand out. It’s unfortunate, but it’s true: Women who stand out from the crowd can be perceived as overly ambitious or social climbers. Rejecting a compliment keeps you on a level playing field.
- We don’t want to seem stuck up. Accepting a compliment can make it seem like you’re acknowledging something good about yourself — and in a woman’s world, even the simple act of saying “thank you” can be perceived as self-aggrandizement.
- We think we’re being tricked. Laura Brannon of Kansas State University says that if we think the complimenter wants something out of us, we’re less likely to believe the compliment.
So what would the world look like if women started accepting more compliments? Personally, I think more women would be empowered in their day-to-day lives and more courageous in business. When someone gives me a compliment, I take it. If you want to take the time to tell me something nice, I want to take the time to enjoy it. And it shows respect to the compliment giver!
Here are my three tips for accepting any compliment:
- Don’t deflect. Accept the compliment. Say thank you. Not “thank you, but …” Just “thank you.” There’s no need to deflect well-earned praise.
- Don’t insult yourself. Not only does insulting yourself lower your self-esteem, it puts the complimenter in the uncomfortable situation of not only offering you a compliment but also acting as your psychotherapist. Take your praise!
- Avoid a compliment battle. There’s no need to one-up your compliment with another compliment. Not only can the situation turn awkward fast, but you don’t want your compliment to come across as insincere. Save your compliments for when you can be thoughtful and authentic.
What are you going to do the next time someone gives you a compliment? Tell me in the comments below! If you’d like tips on how to give praise, check out this blog post on how to craft the perfect compliment.
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Posted by Margaret Page in Uncategorized, Communication, Etiquette Edge and tagged etiquette tips, grace, appreciation, gratitude, manners, thank you, good manners, compliments, Gain Confidence, Class and Communication Skills with Etiquette Products
December 5, 2017
The holidays are always such a magical time. When I first smell that sharp, festive scent of scotch pine in the winter, I know the season is finally here. My family and I celebrate Christmas, and I just love getting into the spirit of the season by listening to Christmas carols and wrapping all the gifts.
My family has a pretty funny history when it comes to gift wrapping. We have gone through several present-wrapping phases. There was a time when we wrapped everything in newspaper, saving money on gift wrap and recycling old newspapers in the process. It was always fun to see what headline you got. A few years later, my sister-in-law made us all reusable gift bags, and we started putting Christmas presents in these bags. However, we always seem to go back to the colorful paper and ribbons, even if wrapping presents with gift wrap takes more time.
I don’t always have time to wrap gifts myself. Some years, I hire a teenager to lend me a hand and do the gift wrapping. It’s a nice opportunity for a young person to earn some extra money during the holidays. Hiring someone else to take on gift wrapping also helps me from getting overly stressed by everything I need to do during the holidays.
During the holidays, we can be doing a lot of dining and entertaining. Women in particular have a tendency of wanting to do everything — I know this from personal experience. There’s this desire to attend all the events, make sure the food is delicious, the house is perfect, the presents look pretty sitting under the tree, and be the best hostess at every event. It is incredibly demanding and can take a lot of the fun out of the holidays, but one strategy can help you finish your to-do list without all the stress.
If you are in charge of planning an event — such as an office party, a family gathering, or even a Christmas caroling outing — start by identifying everything that will need to get done. Pick out the tasks you will most enjoy doing and assign those tasks to yourself.
Next, print out the rest of the tasks on individual slips of paper and put them all into a hat. Pass the hat around to everyone who will be attending and have them draw a task at random. Each person who will be attending the event now has a role in putting on that event. Delegation can be a very important tool when planning, yet it’s not something everyone takes advantage of.
This method can be very beneficial in the professional settingl. Everyone is chipping in and working together as a team toward a common goal. People can practice teamwork while getting to know their co-workers better.
Whatever tasks this time of year brings, I find that when to-do items can be shared or delegated, everything gets done, and you can still enjoy the pleasures of the holiday season.
Happy holidays!
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Posted by Margaret Page in Uncategorized, Newsletters and tagged etiquette tips, Holiday stress
December 4, 2017
There’s something uniquely miserable about forgetting someone’s name. Not only can it make you appear thoughtless or inconsiderate, but it can make the mystery person feel small. And this faux pas can be disastrous when you’re trying to make business connections.
You’re more likely to encounter this delicate situation during the busy holiday season. But don’t panic! A few simple strategies can help you save face.
Don’t try to guess. The only thing worse than blanking on a name is using the incorrect name. If you’re not certain, keep your mouth closed! Better not to refer to Janet as Eva.
Follow the clues. See if you can extract information with a few carefully worded questions. For example: “When did we last see each other?” or “It’s so good to see you! How long has it been?” Hopefully, you’ll gather enough nuggets of information to trigger a memory and recall a name.
Ask for help. If you’re in a group setting — at a networking event, for example — discreetly ask a friend or colleague for the person’s name. If you don’t have the opportunity for a private moment, ask the mystery person to introduce himself to your friend: “Please say hello to my colleague Celeste!”
Play the introduction game. At the first opportunity you get, ask the mystery person to introduce herself to someone else you know: “Have you met Jason?” That gives you the opportunity to be courteous while also prompting the mystery person to divulge the information you need.
Fess up. If all else fails, be honest. It’s best to keep it simple by saying, “I’m so sorry. I remember meeting you but I just can’t seem to recall your name. Could you please remind me?” It’s not ideal, but it’s a better option than flailing — or, worse — using the wrong name.
How do you cover your tracks when you can’t remember a name? Or, even better, what do you do to remember names? Tell me in the comments.
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Posted by Margaret Page in Business Etiquette, Communication, Etiquette Tips, Everyday Etiquette and tagged etiquette tips, handshakes, good manners
July 3, 2017
Facebook and other photo-sharing networks growing life wildfire, many of us have had this unfortunate experience, and the feeling that follows is downright awful! Such careless regard for others’ feelings translates to bad photo etiquette.
Remember, permission is very important, for both taking and sharing a picture of someone else.
This lesson is especially important in dealing with other cultures. All around the globe, people believe that when someone takes your picture, they trap your soul. Carelessly snapping shots of an Australian Aborigine or Native American could be considered a grave offense, and even land you in jail!
Even with your average tech-savvy person, always ask permission before posting pictures of other people online. There are many reasons they might decline, and their privacy must be respected.
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Posted by Margaret in Everyday Etiquette and tagged etiquette tips, photo etiquette, manners, good manners
June 30, 2017
While the knife and spoon have long been accepted as common eating utensils, the fork had a much harder time earning its place at the table. The fork’s similarity to the pitchfork, a sign of the devil, was the source of most resistance.
Imagine the astonishment then, in 1004, when Maria Argyropoulina, Greek niece of Byzantine Emperor Basil II, arrived in Venice for her marriage with a case of golden forks to use at the wedding feast. She was roundly condemned by the local clergy.
When she died of the plague two years later, Saint Peter Damian suggested that it was God’s punishment for her “forked” ways. The devil took her!
By the 1400s dining forks were appearing in Italian cookbooks, and shortly thereafter, another noble marriage influenced the public’s perception of the fork. Catherine de Medici arrived from Italy to marry the future French King Henry II, and with her she brought several dozen intricate silver forks. Wealthy French families eagerly adopted the new Italian influence. (Who knew the fork was once pop culture?)
Well into the early 1800s, forks were still considered a novelty by some, and the source of great confusion to others.
By the first World’s Fair in 1851, the fork had finally gained widespread Western acceptance as a popular eating utensil. It even had its own set of rules to help the confused or socially self conscious. Perhaps that was the point when the fork’s reputation as the ultimate symbol of etiquette issues was first forged.
So, the next time you sit down to a formal meal and feel a hint of panic at the sight of three forks, don’t sweat it! Your ancestors didn’t get it either, but in time, there’s hope for us all.
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Posted by Margaret in History of Etiquette and tagged etiquette tips
June 10, 2017
Lunchtime is a great opportunity to be productive and network. Here is a healthy serving of guidance to help you thrive in a business lunch.
No matter where you go for your business lunch, be on time. If you live in a big city, you know that traffic can be terrible. Even in the worst traffic scenarios, you can be on time if you plan ahead. Arriving early gives you time to use the restroom to check your appearance, fix your tie, reapply lipstick, make sure your shirt is tucked in, etc.
At your lunch meeting, enjoy your meal, be yourself, and remember to exchange any important information before you leave the table.
In Japan, meishi koukan is the formal exchange of business cards. The practice is very important in Japanese culture, and their long list of proper steps in the business card exchange is taken seriously. While we are not so formal in North America we have adopted the Japanese custom of handing a business card to someone with both hands with the print readable to the receiver. Your business card needs to be pristine and accurate. Look the person in the eye as you hand them your business card.
No matter the type of business lunch, whether it is an interview, a sales pitch, or just a get-to-know-you meal, remember your table manners. Keep the phone on silent and put away, and keep your handbag on a hook — never on the table or floor. Know and practice napkin knowhow, silent service code, and be silverware savvy.
Before you meet for your next business lunch, have an outcome for that lunch in mind. If you invited someone to lunch let them know why you are wanted to meet with them. It is good form to pay for your guest if you extended the invitation. If it is a mutually agreed upon luncheon, be prepared to pick up the tab, at least for yourself, when the bill arrives. Most importantly, be polite, stay focused on the outcome, and enjoy the conversation.
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Posted by Margaret Page in Uncategorized, Business Etiquette and tagged etiquette tips, cell phones, manners, courtesies, good manners, Business cards
