Latest "Uncategorized" Posts
May 21, 2018
Constructive feedback can unlock doors. It can help you see the world, and your role in it, in a new light — the best leaders understand this, learn from feedback, and grow.
So why do I cringe internally when I hear, “I have feedback for you?”
I know I’m not alone in this reaction. For many people, “feedback” immediately calls to mind childhood memories of being called into the school principal’s office. This invaluable tool becomes its own form of punishment.
I’ve learned through uncomfortable experience that feedback itself isn’t the problem; rather, it’s the way it’s delivered.
Continue Reading »
Print This Post
Posted by Margaret Page in Uncategorized
April 11, 2018
Technology has allowed us to automate large parts of our lives, including our birthday wishes to friends and professional contacts. Social media have made it so convenient each day to let us know who is having a birthday today or in the days to come. Some platforms even provide a space where we can write a few words, hit enter, and get back to our day — all within ten seconds. And because it’s so easy, we tend to get an avalanche of posts on our birthday.
I just experienced this, receiving over 400 birthday messages. I felt a lot of warmth in the notes and appreciated all the birthday love. It felt fabulous to reconnect with people I hadn’t spoken to or heard from in a while.
When I am extending a birthday wishes I can’t help but wonder how many messages simply get blurred together into a stream of identical wishes that seemed to be written on auto pilot.
With this in mind, if you want your birthday post to have more of an impact — making the recipient feel special and helping to deepen your relationship with them — you have to put some consideration into it. To send a wish that registers in a more meaningful way, keep the following in mind:
Continue Reading »
Print This Post
Posted by Margaret Page in Uncategorized, Business Etiquette, Communication, Etiquette Tips, Everyday Etiquette
April 11, 2018
Women, tell me if you’re familiar with this scenario: You tell a colleague that her work on a presentation was stellar — clear, concise, funny, thoughtful. You walked away with amazing insights and tell her you appreciate her hard work.
And then she brushes it off.
“Oh, it wasn’t that good,” she says.
Or, “I had a lot of help.”
Or maybe even: “I could have done better if I had done more to prepare.”
Sound familiar? You might be cringing right now because you’ve been that woman throwing away a compliment as if it were a hot potato. Can you imagine a man doing such a thing? Why is it that we have such a difficult time just saying, “Thank you! I worked hard.” Or, even better, taking that compliment to heart and really savouring it?
The urge to throw away compliments is real. According to a study by Robert Herbert, a sociolinguist, compliments given from one man to another were accepted 40 percent of the time. Yet women accept only a dismal 22 percent of compliments from other women. (Interestingly, woman accept compliments 68 percent of the time when given by men.)
What makes us throw up our compliment armor? There are several reasons why.
- We don’t want to stand out. It’s unfortunate, but it’s true: Women who stand out from the crowd can be perceived as overly ambitious or social climbers. Rejecting a compliment keeps you on a level playing field.
- We don’t want to seem stuck up. Accepting a compliment can make it seem like you’re acknowledging something good about yourself — and in a woman’s world, even the simple act of saying “thank you” can be perceived as self-aggrandizement.
- We think we’re being tricked. Laura Brannon of Kansas State University says that if we think the complimenter wants something out of us, we’re less likely to believe the compliment.
So what would the world look like if women started accepting more compliments? Personally, I think more women would be empowered in their day-to-day lives and more courageous in business. When someone gives me a compliment, I take it. If you want to take the time to tell me something nice, I want to take the time to enjoy it. And it shows respect to the compliment giver!
Here are my three tips for accepting any compliment:
- Don’t deflect. Accept the compliment. Say thank you. Not “thank you, but …” Just “thank you.” There’s no need to deflect well-earned praise.
- Don’t insult yourself. Not only does insulting yourself lower your self-esteem, it puts the complimenter in the uncomfortable situation of not only offering you a compliment but also acting as your psychotherapist. Take your praise!
- Avoid a compliment battle. There’s no need to one-up your compliment with another compliment. Not only can the situation turn awkward fast, but you don’t want your compliment to come across as insincere. Save your compliments for when you can be thoughtful and authentic.
What are you going to do the next time someone gives you a compliment? Tell me in the comments below! If you’d like tips on how to give praise, check out this blog post on how to craft the perfect compliment.
Continue Reading »
Print This Post
Posted by Margaret Page in Uncategorized, Communication, Etiquette Edge and tagged compliments, Gain Confidence, etiquette tips, Class and Communication Skills with Etiquette Products, grace, appreciation, gratitude, manners, thank you, good manners
December 5, 2017
The holidays are always such a magical time. When I first smell that sharp, festive scent of scotch pine in the winter, I know the season is finally here. My family and I celebrate Christmas, and I just love getting into the spirit of the season by listening to Christmas carols and wrapping all the gifts.
My family has a pretty funny history when it comes to gift wrapping. We have gone through several present-wrapping phases. There was a time when we wrapped everything in newspaper, saving money on gift wrap and recycling old newspapers in the process. It was always fun to see what headline you got. A few years later, my sister-in-law made us all reusable gift bags, and we started putting Christmas presents in these bags. However, we always seem to go back to the colorful paper and ribbons, even if wrapping presents with gift wrap takes more time.
I don’t always have time to wrap gifts myself. Some years, I hire a teenager to lend me a hand and do the gift wrapping. It’s a nice opportunity for a young person to earn some extra money during the holidays. Hiring someone else to take on gift wrapping also helps me from getting overly stressed by everything I need to do during the holidays.
During the holidays, we can be doing a lot of dining and entertaining. Women in particular have a tendency of wanting to do everything — I know this from personal experience. There’s this desire to attend all the events, make sure the food is delicious, the house is perfect, the presents look pretty sitting under the tree, and be the best hostess at every event. It is incredibly demanding and can take a lot of the fun out of the holidays, but one strategy can help you finish your to-do list without all the stress.
If you are in charge of planning an event — such as an office party, a family gathering, or even a Christmas caroling outing — start by identifying everything that will need to get done. Pick out the tasks you will most enjoy doing and assign those tasks to yourself.
Next, print out the rest of the tasks on individual slips of paper and put them all into a hat. Pass the hat around to everyone who will be attending and have them draw a task at random. Each person who will be attending the event now has a role in putting on that event. Delegation can be a very important tool when planning, yet it’s not something everyone takes advantage of.
This method can be very beneficial in the professional settingl. Everyone is chipping in and working together as a team toward a common goal. People can practice teamwork while getting to know their co-workers better.
Whatever tasks this time of year brings, I find that when to-do items can be shared or delegated, everything gets done, and you can still enjoy the pleasures of the holiday season.
Happy holidays!
Continue Reading »
Print This Post
Posted by Margaret Page in Uncategorized, Newsletters and tagged etiquette tips, Holiday stress
June 10, 2017
Lunchtime is a great opportunity to be productive and network. Here is a healthy serving of guidance to help you thrive in a business lunch.
No matter where you go for your business lunch, be on time. If you live in a big city, you know that traffic can be terrible. Even in the worst traffic scenarios, you can be on time if you plan ahead. Arriving early gives you time to use the restroom to check your appearance, fix your tie, reapply lipstick, make sure your shirt is tucked in, etc.
At your lunch meeting, enjoy your meal, be yourself, and remember to exchange any important information before you leave the table.
In Japan, meishi koukan is the formal exchange of business cards. The practice is very important in Japanese culture, and their long list of proper steps in the business card exchange is taken seriously. While we are not so formal in North America we have adopted the Japanese custom of handing a business card to someone with both hands with the print readable to the receiver. Your business card needs to be pristine and accurate. Look the person in the eye as you hand them your business card.
No matter the type of business lunch, whether it is an interview, a sales pitch, or just a get-to-know-you meal, remember your table manners. Keep the phone on silent and put away, and keep your handbag on a hook — never on the table or floor. Know and practice napkin knowhow, silent service code, and be silverware savvy.
Before you meet for your next business lunch, have an outcome for that lunch in mind. If you invited someone to lunch let them know why you are wanted to meet with them. It is good form to pay for your guest if you extended the invitation. If it is a mutually agreed upon luncheon, be prepared to pick up the tab, at least for yourself, when the bill arrives. Most importantly, be polite, stay focused on the outcome, and enjoy the conversation.
Continue Reading »
Print This Post
Posted by Margaret Page in Uncategorized, Business Etiquette and tagged cell phones, manners, courtesies, good manners, Business cards, etiquette tips
March 19, 2017
If you have done any kind of travel, especially for business, you will have noticed there can be huge differences in the way we communicate, ways of dress, leisure activities, and business practices from Coast to Coast. Our cultural norms—how we behave socially or in business from region to region or age group to age group—can feel as dramatic as visiting a foreign land.
According to a prominent social and cultural psychologist, the stereotypes we hear are true – the East is more old and established and the West is more new and free, and this does not differ in the business world.
Continue Reading »
Print This Post
Posted by Margaret Page in Uncategorized and tagged etiquette tips, handshakes, good manners, culture
September 14, 2016
You’re ready to take on the corporate world. Your work clothes are impeccable, your resume is polished to a perfect sheen and you’ve got the references, skills, and ambition to back it all up. That’s everything, right? Wrong.
When you’re prepping for a job search or promotion, don’t forget to clean up your social media accounts. Social media a pivotal tool for resourcing and building brand awareness — both for professionals and businesses — and it’s becoming a more prevalent screening tool for human resources departments.
According to themuse.com, a corporate job board and job seeker advisory, three out of four hiring managers check candidates’ social media profiles — even when they aren’t linked. But wait; it gets worse. One in three employers rejected candidates because of something on their social media profiles. That means there’s a good chance those photos of the wild weekend you had a few months ago could cost you a job, promotion or even your career.
It’s not just irresponsible content that can get you fired. Recruiters and HR departments alike can be turned off by anything, from the mildest profanities to politically divisive posts, provocative pictures, illegal drugs or alcohol, discriminatory remarks, poor communication skills and openly badmouthing previous employers.
In the digital age, even when you’re not working, you’re working. It’s vital to present a consistent, professional personal brand across all platforms. For more tips on how to execute your social media presence impeccably, visit our blog at www.archive.margaretpage.com/social-media-fiascos-avoid-scandal.
Continue Reading »
Print This Post
Posted by Margaret Page in Uncategorized and tagged photo etiquette, first impressions, Gain Confidence, Class and Communication Skills with Etiquette Products, social media for employees
July 29, 2016
The social media revolution has conditioned us to think that everything must be shared: Our thoughts, our schedules — even our meals! But while all of that sharing might be great for friends and family, the rules are different for business. An embarrassing post could block you from a promotion or a new job. In fact, it might even cost you your career.
According to the blog The Hiring Site, 60 percent of employers use social media to screen job candidates. Human resources departments may ask that you install device management software on your personal cell phone or iPad if you also use it for business, and some human resources departments actually track their employees’ private Facebook and Twitter accounts.
So how can you protect your accounts and present the best version of yourself? Here are a few practical tips that may save you heartache.
Think like an employer. Before applying for a job, scour your social media accounts for incriminating photos — it’s best that you do so before human resources does. (This is especially important for people just entering the job market.) Remove any photos that contain evidence of excessive alcohol consumption, drug use, obscene gestures, or illegal activity. Remember, a company is making an investment in you — and you need to do everything possible to make yourself seem worthy of that investment. If you wouldn’t want your grandmother to see it, delete or untag yourself (or both).
Add Timeline Review to your Facebook account. Timeline Review allows you the first and final say over what appears on your Facebook page. All posts made to your page first must be approved through the review process; you may delete whichever posts you don’t care to keep. To turn Timeline Review on, click at the top right of any Facebook page and select Settings, then click Timeline and Tagging in the left column. Look for “Review posts friends tag you in before they appear on your Timeline?” and click on Edit, then select Enabled from the drop-down menu. Keep in mind that mentions of you may appear elsewhere on Facebook, such as in search, but Timeline Review gives you a bit more control over your own page.
Set your accounts to private. Setting your accounts to private is the easiest way to maintain control over what the public sees. Facebook, Twitter, and Instagram all allow private account settings that are available to other users only by request. An employer will be able to see your comments on other people’s pages, but your own accounts will be protected.
Make your wishes clear. Be honest with your friends and family members: Let them know that you need their discretion. Ask them to refrain from posting and tagging without your permission. If you encounter resistance, it might be time to unfriend that person — both in social media and in real life!
Deal with problems directly. Everyone makes mistakes, but move swiftly if you encounter a photo or post that could make trouble for you. Speak directly to the person who put the photo or information on social media — in this case, a phone call or face-to-face meeting is best, if possible.
How have you overcome an embarrassing situation on social media? Tell me in the comments below!
Continue Reading »
Print This Post
Posted by Margaret Page in Uncategorized, Etiquette Edge and tagged social media etiquette for employers, social media for employees, etiquette tips, manners, guide to social media etiquette, social media etiquette, social media manners
March 20, 2016
Think, for a moment, about the last compliment you received: Did it make you feel good? Uplift your day? I’m guessing the answer to both questions is “yes” — and there’s a reason for that. According to Japanese researchers, compliments activate the striatum, a region of the brain that also lights up when we’re given cash. That’s right: A compliment is currency, and just as rewarding!
When you offer a sincere compliment you really are giving a gift. A genuine, thoughtful compliment is a multi-faceted tool. It can be a conversation starter, a relationship builder, a confidence booster, or a way to express goodwill and spread gratitude. You can make someone’s day with a few well-chosen words.
Here’s my formula for crafting the perfect compliment.
Be thoughtful. It’s easy to toss off a compliment about a piece of clothing or jewelry, but a meaningful compliment requires observation. Maybe the person you’d like to compliment recently celebrated a personal milestone or completed a big project. Maybe you’ve noticed his knack for drafting excellent emails or the way she makes everyone feel appreciated during meetings. Expand your awareness and look for attributes that people value and work hard to maintain. A non-cliché compliment, or noticing something that person has never noticed about himself or herself, will set you apart.
Be genuine. Think about a compliment you’ve received that fell flat. When someone offers a run-of-the-mill compliment, or when you know the same tired compliment has been extended to other people, it can feel like an unsophisticated attempt at flattery. Such “compliments” affect the credibility of the person giving the compliment. Ensure your own compliments are genuine by being specific and maintaining eye contact. Your body language will support your sincerity.
Keep it succinct. Compliments are gifts — and like gifts, too many can be overwhelming. Showering compliments can feel insincere, so keep yours to just one or two. Lastly, if at any time you feel compelled to say, “I meant that as a compliment,” then refrain from giving the “compliment” altogether.
Ready to ramp up your complimenting? I challenge you to give three compliments a day. Let me know how it goes! Would you like to learn how you can be more socially savvy in your day-to-day encounters? Contact me today for a coaching session, with my compliments!
Continue Reading »
Print This Post
Posted by Margaret Page in Uncategorized
