Latest "Etiquette Edge" Posts
November 21, 2018
grat-i-tude [grat-i-tood]
noun
The quality or feeling of being grateful or thankful; readiness to show appreciation for and to return kindness.
The last bowls of turkey soup (the best thing about leftover Thanksgiving turkey) have been served here in Canada, but the biggest holiday of the year is almost here for our friends in the US. With Thanksgiving, both in Canada and in the United States, there comes a heightened sense of gratitude. A keen sense of nostalgia and recognition for all that is good in our life.
At our house, during dessert at Thanksgiving, we go around the table –each of us sharing what we are thankful for. Guests always mention how good it feels to share what they are grateful for, and to hear what others give thanks for.
It’s such a simple thing, really, to stop and think about the things, and the people who bring us joy. But when was the last time you took a moment out of your (regular) day and acknowledged what you are truly thankful for?
Why Gratitude?
There is a plethora of information touting the benefits of cultivating gratitude on a daily basis. Just plug “benefits of gratitude” into Google and you’ll see a slew of results pop up on the health benefits – both mental and physical.
Let’s face it – life is busy. Time whizzes by and before you know it, we’re turning the calendar to a brand new year. No one is immune to the passing of time, but we can all learn to express it – and be more in the moment.
Here are two ways you can start flexing your gratitude muscles today:
Say thank you. I make it a habit of sending out one card per day to people who have enriched my life. Acknowledge those people who have an impact on your daily life. Send a card. Give them a call. Write a personal note or email expressing gratitude for their support or encouragement. Say “thanks” in person. It doesn’t matter what the delivery platform is, it’s the sentiment that counts.
Start a gratitude journal. At the end of each day, write down at least three things you are grateful for. If you want to skip the pen and paper, there are a ton of gratitude apps out there now to make it really easy for you to keep track of those moments of gratitude. I use Gratitude 365 – and so does my young grandson!
By making it a habit of practicing gratitude all year long, you will find that your thoughts and words will become more positive. Lose all those negative things you tell yourself–the “don’ts and “nots” and “should-haves”—and shift your focus on giving thanks for all the little things that make you smile every day.
Happy Thanksgiving to my American friends!
“Be thankful for what you have; you’ll end up having more. If you concentrate on what you don’t have, you will never, ever have enough.” – Oprah Winfrey
Photo credit: Stuart Miles
Continue Reading »
Print This Post
Posted by Margaret Page in Everyday Etiquette and tagged gratitude
November 20, 2018
Business etiquette sometimes catches up with us outside the office: in coffee shops, at a friend’s house, or even grocery shopping. An associate recently told me that she was dreading running into a former co-worker who had been abruptly fired the week before. What should she say to this person? How could she avoid making a touchy event worse?
The short answer: Be kind. Be hopeful. Be discreet. You can’t always control how or when you’ll encounter tricky situations, but with a little foresight you can prepare and eliminate awkwardness. Here are four tips to keep you on track.
Continue Reading »
Print This Post
Posted by Margaret Page in Uncategorized, Communication, Etiquette Tips, Everyday Etiquette and tagged good manners, etiquette tips
October 26, 2018
I work with many clients in China and India, two powerhouse markets that celebrate holidays on a different calendar than those of us in North America. I always try to stay on top of international holidays — not only is it a wonderful conversation point, but I enjoy learning about other cultures through their major festivals and events.
Wading into these holidays can be a bit tricky for the uninitiated. In India alone,
Continue Reading »
Print This Post
Posted by Margaret Page in Uncategorized, Dining Etiquette, Etiquette Edge, Etiquette Tips, International Etiquette and tagged courtesies, culture, cultural awareness
October 23, 2018
I absolutely love self-improvement books because I’m on a lifelong quest for growth. I’ve read countless tomes about ways to better understand the world, business, and myself. These five books are some of my current favorites for sparking ideas and learning more about how people work.
The Culture Code: An Ingenious Way to Understand Why People Around the World Live and Buy As They Doby Clotaire Rapaille.This beautiful book gives an unbridled perspective on how a variety of cultures view the world — the “code” mentioned in the title. I found the author’s summaries so fascinating. When he held the mirror up to my own country, I didn’t always like what he revealed. But that’s the value of this book: It forces us to look at cultures from a different angle than what we were taught.
Continue Reading »
Print This Post
Posted by Margaret Page in Uncategorized, Communication, Just for Fun
September 21, 2018
I am often on the road or up in the air. I travel extensively and internationally for my business, self-development and for causes I care about, so I’ve amassed a trove of sanity-saving apps that keep me organized, on time — and entertained. That’s no small feat when I might be in Tokyo on Tuesday and Toronto on Thursday.
These eight apps have become my essential traveling companions.
Continue Reading »
Print This Post
Posted by Margaret Page in Uncategorized, Communication, Etiquette Tips, Everyday Etiquette, International Etiquette and tagged #travel #roadwarrior
August 10, 2018
You’re often interrupted in the middle of a sentence. Colleagues railroad you when you try to make a point at a meeting. You’re introduced multiple times to the same person — and she never remembers encountering you.
I hear complaints such as these quite often in my coaching business. A client might blame others for being rude, overly ambitious, or thoughtless. Unfortunately, I have to explain that the problem isn’t other people — it’s the client himself.
There’s a simple explanation: All day, every day, we telegraph information about ourselves without speaking. Our body language and movements have a huge impact on the way others perceive us, interact with us, and defer to us.
The good news is that awareness is the first step to claiming your power as a memorable, compelling person. Here are five common mistakes that may be holding you back (and how to fix them).
Continue Reading »
Print This Post
Posted by Margaret Page in Communication and tagged first impressions
May 26, 2018
Instant messaging has revolutionized the business world, with services like WhatsApp, LINE, and WeChat taking the place of phone calls and email. In fact, emails have become so outmoded — especially among younger generations — that some businesses have eliminated internal email altogether.
But if you’re new to this back-and-forth, rapid-fire style of communication, instant messaging can be a dizzying experience — and open you up to unexpected gaffes. Navigating the waters in tricky enough that some wealthy Chinese women take etiquette classesthat feature an entire module on WeChat, China’s most popular instant messaging service.
No matter the platform, there are a few basic rules that will keep you from annoying, insulting, or otherwise infuriating your instant messaging contacts.
Understand notification settings. Unlike email or voicemail, your recipients on instant messaging services can see whether you have received and read their messages — and if you let a long period of time go by without responding, it’s nearly as bad as not paying attention to someone who is speaking to you in person. Respond to direct messages promptly, even if it’s to say that you’ll follow up later.
Continue Reading »
Print This Post
Posted by Margaret Page in Business Etiquette, Communication, Etiquette Tips, Everyday Etiquette, International Etiquette and tagged etiquette tips for communication
May 8, 2018
Twenty-five years ago, the idea that I could open a small screen in Canada and have a meeting with a colleague in Indonesia was absolutely something out of a science fiction novel. Now, it’s something I do on a weekly basis — and I’ve noticed that virtual meetings are just as rife with etiquette faux pas as in-person meetin
Live chat, screen shares, and video cams are an essential part of doing business today, but they have their own special rules and challenges. I’ve run hundreds of virtual meetings over the years and learned from my mistakes. Here are my top tips to help you leave the right impression and make the most of your screen time.
Common Courtesy
- Find a quiet space. Obviously, noisy coffee shops are not ideal. If working from home, keep the barking dogs and kids in another room. In the office, close the office door or find a conference space.
- Avoid distractions. Focus on the meeting and avoid temptation to scan the web or look at your phone.
- For video calls on Skype or other platforms, dress in business casual and be well groomed. If working from home, test the camera angle to make sure a neutral background is all that is visible (not breakfast dishes and sweatpants).
- If possible, invest in a good headset and mic that cancel out background noise.
Tips for Hosts
Continue Reading »
Print This Post
Posted by Margaret Page in Business Etiquette, Communication, Etiquette Tips and tagged technology, #businessetiquette
April 11, 2018
Technology has allowed us to automate large parts of our lives, including our birthday wishes to friends and professional contacts. Social media have made it so convenient each day to let us know who is having a birthday today or in the days to come. Some platforms even provide a space where we can write a few words, hit enter, and get back to our day — all within ten seconds. And because it’s so easy, we tend to get an avalanche of posts on our birthday.
I just experienced this, receiving over 400 birthday messages. I felt a lot of warmth in the notes and appreciated all the birthday love. It felt fabulous to reconnect with people I hadn’t spoken to or heard from in a while.
When I am extending a birthday wishes I can’t help but wonder how many messages simply get blurred together into a stream of identical wishes that seemed to be written on auto pilot.
With this in mind, if you want your birthday post to have more of an impact — making the recipient feel special and helping to deepen your relationship with them — you have to put some consideration into it. To send a wish that registers in a more meaningful way, keep the following in mind:
Continue Reading »
Print This Post
Posted by Margaret Page in Uncategorized, Business Etiquette, Communication, Etiquette Tips, Everyday Etiquette
April 11, 2018
Women, tell me if you’re familiar with this scenario: You tell a colleague that her work on a presentation was stellar — clear, concise, funny, thoughtful. You walked away with amazing insights and tell her you appreciate her hard work.
And then she brushes it off.
“Oh, it wasn’t that good,” she says.
Or, “I had a lot of help.”
Or maybe even: “I could have done better if I had done more to prepare.”
Sound familiar? You might be cringing right now because you’ve been that woman throwing away a compliment as if it were a hot potato. Can you imagine a man doing such a thing? Why is it that we have such a difficult time just saying, “Thank you! I worked hard.” Or, even better, taking that compliment to heart and really savouring it?
The urge to throw away compliments is real. According to a study by Robert Herbert, a sociolinguist, compliments given from one man to another were accepted 40 percent of the time. Yet women accept only a dismal 22 percent of compliments from other women. (Interestingly, woman accept compliments 68 percent of the time when given by men.)
What makes us throw up our compliment armor? There are several reasons why.
- We don’t want to stand out. It’s unfortunate, but it’s true: Women who stand out from the crowd can be perceived as overly ambitious or social climbers. Rejecting a compliment keeps you on a level playing field.
- We don’t want to seem stuck up. Accepting a compliment can make it seem like you’re acknowledging something good about yourself — and in a woman’s world, even the simple act of saying “thank you” can be perceived as self-aggrandizement.
- We think we’re being tricked. Laura Brannon of Kansas State University says that if we think the complimenter wants something out of us, we’re less likely to believe the compliment.
So what would the world look like if women started accepting more compliments? Personally, I think more women would be empowered in their day-to-day lives and more courageous in business. When someone gives me a compliment, I take it. If you want to take the time to tell me something nice, I want to take the time to enjoy it. And it shows respect to the compliment giver!
Here are my three tips for accepting any compliment:
- Don’t deflect. Accept the compliment. Say thank you. Not “thank you, but …” Just “thank you.” There’s no need to deflect well-earned praise.
- Don’t insult yourself. Not only does insulting yourself lower your self-esteem, it puts the complimenter in the uncomfortable situation of not only offering you a compliment but also acting as your psychotherapist. Take your praise!
- Avoid a compliment battle. There’s no need to one-up your compliment with another compliment. Not only can the situation turn awkward fast, but you don’t want your compliment to come across as insincere. Save your compliments for when you can be thoughtful and authentic.
What are you going to do the next time someone gives you a compliment? Tell me in the comments below! If you’d like tips on how to give praise, check out this blog post on how to craft the perfect compliment.
Continue Reading »
Print This Post
Posted by Margaret Page in Uncategorized, Communication, Etiquette Edge and tagged compliments, Gain Confidence, etiquette tips, Class and Communication Skills with Etiquette Products, grace, appreciation, gratitude, manners, thank you, good manners
