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Express Yourself – How to Reveal a Bit of Sass with a Lot of Class

Have you ever encountered someone who left an unexpected and lasting impression? These people can be few and far between, but when life brings us one, it’s always wise to ponder the experience. Profound lessons may be presenting themselves.

In May, I was the keynote speaker at the annual Every Woman conference in Whistler, Canada. Co-founded by Olympic runner Lynn Kanuka and world champion gymnast Kerri Carlson, this unique forum empowers “every woman” to:

…achieve your goals and fulfill your dreams, to feel uninhibited in trying new activities, challenging yourself and being supported by the women around you…. utilize physical activity to motivate you and to help you to think more clearly, to adopt a healthy lifestyle utilize physical and to take care of your body, to reconnect with ourselves and our friends, to learn something from someone new or different, to keep challenging yourself and to examine what it is we want out of life, and by golly, to have fun!

From belly dancing to laughter yoga, cardio striptease and even a couch potato workout (!), this event was designed to help women get moving, enjoy themselves and feel alive.

I was intrigued to find a burlesque class on the itinerary, and I was curious what it was all about. If you aren’t familiar with this particular art form, here’s a little background.

Burlesque was popular from the 1860s to the 1940s, often in cabarets, clubs and theatres, and featured bawdy comedy and female striptease. By the late 1930s, burlesque shows had up to six exotic dancers, usually supported by one or two comics and a master of ceremonies. Burlesque is presented in a high-spirited mood, and its history includes notable comics such as Mae West, W. C. Fields, Jackie Gleason, and Abbott and Costello. Since the 1990s, there has been a resurgence of interest in burlesque and the fun-loving, glamorous, uninhibited atmosphere of such a show.

Our burlesque dance teacher’s name was Mariah, and her commanding presence completely captivated the room. With volumes of long, red curly hair, a burgundy dance leotard and a flowing ballet skirt, she was a vision of energy and motion. I was intrigued, and I wasn’t alone. Even without a microphone, she had the undivided attention of 100+ women.

“Ladies!” she called out with sheer delight, “It’s time to feel your radiance!” As we soon discovered, self-appreciation is the first and most important ingredient in a saucy burlesque performance.

“Let’s start by reaching down to our ankles, laying our hands gently on our bodies, and slowly drawing them up, tracing and embracing our womanly curves. Flow your hands over your hips, to the curve of your waist, and follow your torso all the way up. As you go, I want to hear you saying: ‘I have arrived and I am FABULOUS!’ When you reach the top, stretch up high and say, ‘Ahhh!’”

What a mood changer! I thought to myself, “Now I know why they call the wind Mariah” (from the Broadway musical, Paint Your Wagon).

Over the course of one hour, her charisma and enthusiasm set the room on fire, transforming our large group of somewhat inhibited women into a hotbed of sensual motion.

That is no small feat – especially in Canada! So, it begs the question: how did she do it?

Her first secret was an attitude of radical self-acceptance. We all know that confidence is sexy, but the way Mariah strutted and swayed revealed an uncommon level of comfort with her womanly curves. Somehow, seeing that modeled gave us all permission to move more freely. “Don’t be shy about your curves, celebrate them! After all, they distinguish us from the men. And a lady who is comfortable in her body and truly enjoys it is deeply intriguing and sexy to a man.”

Her second secret was a deep understanding of sensuality. “Being comfortable with your body comes from feeling it, and enjoying all the ways you can move and express your femininity. Being aware of your body and feeling it move is a sensual act; it lights up your senses. That experience of sensuality is sexy!”

Her third secret was all about expressing the energy of the dance with an extra bit of flair. “Think hips, lips and tips, Ladies!” And for that crucial element of sass, she taught us how to throw a fiercely flirty look to the audience. (Hint: it starts with having the right thought in mind… but I probably shouldn’t print it here!)

Beyond the basics of form and technique, Mariah’s most valuable lesson was delivered through her being – being comfortable with who she is and completely at home in her own skin. And, perhaps more importantly, being comfortable with everyone else in the room. Mariah inspired us to enjoy ourselves and our womanly bodies, and to accept ourselves and each other completely.

Think about that for a moment! There is so much power and possibility in acceptance. So much freedom and joy when there is nothing to hide!

There are so many opportunities to feel bold and celebrate yourself, and revel in the experience of others celebrating you. In the end, isn’t that really the heart of burlesque?

Mariah says she teaches dance, but the way I see it, she teaches people how to loosen up tight bodies and minds, and embrace a deep awareness of the sheer pleasure of being alive. She reminded me to enjoy the simple things in life, like the feel of smooth, well-fitting fabric on my skin, or the energy and nourishment I get from healthy foods. There is so much pleasure available in every moment! We just have to reach for it.

Whether you like to dance or not, that is one type of exercise that anyone can do – and it always feels good.

Questions to Consider:

1.   How do you hide your inner Mariah – and why?
2.   Who would you be if you accepted yourself fully?
3.   How can you express your pleasure-loving, flirtatious side in a bold yet classy way?

Note: Mariah-Jane Thies is a ballet teacher, and a natural performer. After a brief stint in a local production of the musical “Sweet Charity,” portraying a flirty, sensual dancehall girl, she fell in love with the art of burlesque – and let me tell you, it showed. If you’re interested in learning more of her secrets and drawing inspiration from her passion, you can connect with her on Facebook or read her blog.

That reminds me… I’m on Facebook too! Have we connected yet? If not, please reach out and “friend” me! If you prefer Twitter, I’m there too. Let’s link up!

Posted by Amazing Editor in A Page of Insight.